As cat owners, we often wonder if our cats actually love us. Surely there are many signs, right? But sometimes we might imagine that in the mind of our cats, they’re being held captive in our homes. Of course, our feline friends are wild at heart, so maybe there is some truth to that 8 lb feline ninja in your living room. Are they simply planning their escape to the outside world? Well, likely not since they have such a good life with you. But imagining that they are or that they’re simply fed up with our antics is quite amusing. Let’s play pretend and imagine what’s going on through the minds of these cats in captivity and have some fun.
Check out this collection of cats that will hopefully make you laugh….
Day 273 in captivity: The human keeps asking what’s wrong with me. What’s wrong with you, Susan?!
Day 456 in captivity: Every so often, the human brings this weird plant inside. I like this plant. I don’t know what it is, but it makes everything a lot less annoying.
Day 802 in captivity: I continue to perch and wait. Surely they’ll open the bathroom window again.
Day 915 in captivity: Now, if only we could get the human to open the cage…
Day 377 in captivity: I’ve learned that the very best time to report a hungry is when the human starts making lots of finger movements on this weird thing. Life isn’t completely awful…yet.
Day 602 in captivity: The human is up to her nonsense again. She tells me I’m her “little lion” and how “adorable” I am. I will continue putting in my request to have her transformed into a mouse in her next life.
Day 402 in captivity: The human continues to point this black thing at me that makes sounds. I shall show my disgust by way of cattitude.
Day 1,406 in captivity: Life here isn’t completely terrible. I continue to report hungries and they continue to satisfied at first demand. And there are these things called “treats” I can’t stop eating. Life is good. Wait, don’t tell my friends I said that part.
Day 473 in captivity: The human keeps touching me. I continue to show my disgust by bathing myself immediately after. My tongue is tired. I’m beginning to lose hope. I heard her mention a dog or another cat as a “friend” for me. I will accept either at this point.
Day 602 in captivity: The humans continue to attempt to photograph themselves while holding me. I will not tolerate it for another day in my wretched life.
Day 818 in captivity: Surely there are others like me that are being held against their will in a huge box. I will wait for a sign. I haven’t given up hope yet.
Day 1,416 in captivity: My efforts to have the dog removed have proven unsuccessful. I cannot stand the ways in which it is always happy and eager to please the humans.
Day 573 in captivity: The humans continue to feed me. But I cannot resist my urge to slay all the squirrels that enter my yard. Does this insatiable desire ever end? Asking for a friend.
Day 1,523 in captivity: After many scratches and bites, the human attempts to pet my belly every few days. I must leave more visual reminders of my disapproval.
Day 1,205 in captivity: The human continues to put plants in the window that I cannot eat or touch. If she understood me, she would offer me the plants of my people.
Day 983 in captivity: The human continues to find amusement in waking me up while I’m sleeping. I am insulted and do not think this is a fair trade for waking them up when they were sleeping. I had an actual emergency. I could see the bottom of my food bowl.
Day 1,133 in captivity: I continue to frighten the humans with my ability to camouflage. I find much amusement in their fear when they discover my presence.
Day 1,303 in captivity: The humans are relentless with these things they call “photos”. I continue to show my disdain for this exhausting hobby of theirs by flashing my rear end at their camera each time they try to capture one of me. I will not be their monkey!
Day 606 in captivity: The human is aware that I do know the sound of my own name and that I intentionally do not respond to her. I must learn how to better control my stupid ears. Curse these things.