A lot of times when we are jealous, it stems from something inside of us that we are insecure about. Now, I’ve never been a jealous person when it comes to a significant other. I think a lot of that has to do with my peculiar upbringing, but when it comes to success that others had that I didn’t it used to eat me up inside. I know that others may have felt the same way, too. There is a clear difference between jealousy and envy. But when it comes to something YOU want out of life, what is holding you back from getting it? Well, the answer is yourself.
When I started writing professionally, I wasn’t that great. I mean, really, what writer is? But I was driven, and I was hungry, and I was equally persistent and consistent. I’ve never lost that ambition and I know that’s what keeps me going, I will always be hungry for more. That is my personal recipe for success.
In life, when you want something bad enough, you’re willing to work for it, right? Because it will take work. You have to stop asking yourself “why not me?!” and make it a reality.
That is the crucial first step to changing your life the way you want to change it.
It won’t be easy, and you will likely fall flat on your damn face. But for myself, I learned the only way to conquer the envy I felt for others was that I had to grow a pair and work for it. And it worked. I cannot tell you how many dozens of people each day I would contact trying to get published on their site. I wanted it bad enough I learned to let go of the fear that was holding me back. Rejection is a powerful thing that can overwhelm you if you let it. You just have to learn that with each “no” you are that much closer to the “yes” you are wanting. And it won’t happen overnight.
Fear is the only thing holding us back from achieving our best selves. Think about what it is that you want. And make a plan for yourself. In addition to this, you have to realize aside from fear, things that might be holding you back and cut them out of your life.
I have an extreme love/hate relationship with social media. But once I fully understood that those who truly had success weren’t flaunting it 24/7, I realized more how success was measured. And I also realized how much negativity—from thoughts to people—could greatly impact your life. Your path to finding success for yourself is often marked by struggle and if you keep negativity in your life that is a recipe for disaster. It will get hard, you might thinking about giving up. But if you do, you’ll still be in that danger zone of wishing your life was something else that it’s not.
Rid yourself of the one-uppers and the people who are constantly negative or complaining. Surround yourself with positivity to bring positive things into your life. I love to set goals for myself so that I can accomplish them and set new goals. And they don’t always have to be big goals. They can be small goals, too.
Establish a growth mindset for yourself and stick with it. Additionally, you have to be realistic with yourself and let your ego go. When I started writing professionally, I took jobs that didn’t pay that great, or some not even at all, so that I could build my writing resume. And my first job I ever got paid to write on was for a landfill. Not exactly a glamorous topic.
Fast-forward to a decade later and I sometimes still can’t believe that the life I live now is one I could have never even dreamed of. I get paid to write by people all over the globe and they are thrilled with the work that I produce. I’ve come a long way since writing about trash. 😂
Keep in mind, I did all of this while raising children. And I had to find a way to help support our family financially. Childcare wasn’t an option as it was too expensive and we had no help from family. I needed to find a way to earn a living from home, and fast. I know that this inspired me more because I wanted to find a way to keep a roof over our heads. Sometimes in life our motivators can come in many forms. Yes, I felt guilt at times from having to work long hours and not being the fun mom who was carefree, but such is life and I love that my kids know I’m a hard worker and I inspire them to work hard, too.
We all have to start somewhere and the only way to put ourselves on the path of success or where we want to go in life is to stop asking ourselves “why not me?!” and make it happen.
There will always be someone richer than you, prettier than you, thinner than you, but there will always only be one you. Be the best you and don’t hold yourself back from getting what you want out of life. ✌🏼